By now, you probably know how I feel about being a good wife in the small things.
You’ve seen what I have to say about delivering light bulbs and using trash bags. For many of us, those little moments are where the bulk of our marriage testing will come from. I’ll have bigger struggles as the years roll on, but most of my opportunities to practice being the wife God calls me to be will come in the everyday aspects of life. One of those everyday areas that I’m asking the Lord to grow me in is listening to Andrew’s likes and dislikes and honoring him in those.
Here’s an example.
My brothers stop by our place fairly often in between classes or to watch a sporting event on TV. When I hear their knock, rather than get off the couch or leave the dishes to open the door, I just yell, “Come in!” loud enough for them to hear me. Several times when I’ve done that while Andrew was downstairs, he’s told me he really doesn’t like it when I yell like that. I can understand; we all have little things that rub us the wrong way, for whatever reason. I’ve continued to do it because it’s a habit and I forget that it bothers him.
A couple of days ago, one of my brothers knocked and I remembered not to yell. As Andrew walked toward the door to open it, he said, “Thank you for not yelling.” He noticed that I refrained and it meant something to him.
Again, it’s one of those teeny tiny things, but by slightly adjusting a habit I’d formed to accommodate his preference, I can show him that I 1) listen to his thoughts about things and 2) am willing to change in order to honor his wishes, even when they’re not a hill to die on for him. It shows that he’s important to me, and I want to make him happy.
If you’re married, I’d encourage you to keep your ears open for those little preferences and meet them when it’s possible.
Our husbands appreciate it when they know we are listening to them and striving to honor them in both little and big ways. Small things can go a very long way in communicating love and priorities.